Unsolicited Suggestions For Senior Citizens - Suggestions

   

  When you get old, never teach anyone anything, even if you are sure you are right.

Do not try to help unless requested.

Don’t impose yourself on anyone.

Don’t try to protect your loved ones from all the misfortunes of the World. Just love them.

Don’t complain about your health, your neighbours, your retirement.

Don’t expect gratitude from children.

There are no ungrateful children, there are only stupid parents, who expect gratitude from their children.

Don’t waste your last money on anti-age treatments. It’s useless.

Better spend it on a trip.

Take care of your spouse, even if he/she becomes a wrinkled, helpless and moody old person. Don’t forget he/she was once young, good looking and cheerful, maybe he/she is the only one who really needs you right now.

Understand new technologies, obsessively follow the News, constantly study something new, do not fall behind in time.

Why Stationery For Home Is Important?

 

It is important because we have many things to remember and keep track of. What is stationery? A piece of paper and a pencil.

The rest are its helpers like a notebook, sharpener, rubber, rack, fountain pen, ink, ink-remover, paper clip, stapler, punch machine, file cover, file rack, etc. There are some documents which you cannot have them in soft copy. You have to have them in a hard copy. Driving license, your national identity card, your passport, your bank credit card, your bank checkbook, your educational degrees. All these are in hard copy. You keep them in a place where they are kept safe. For this, you need a shelf which carries some partitions to put these documents in a proper manner. Besides this, we need a writing table and a chair too. We also need some small notebook or a pad to note down our busy day work plan. We also need to have a grocery list in which we write down. The bills we pay are in the shape of stationery. After the payment of the bill, we need to have the record for future reference. You also need to have your medical record file. As it is very important, especially for the doctors to know your history. The other habit which we need to have is to keep everything in its proper place as mentioned in my earlier blog. As we are living in the digital age and feel that the use of hard copies is finished. No. It is still in and will remain in, as many people love to write. To keep in touch we now use emails and other apps to share our views. But writing a letter or a greeting card has its own beauty. After some passage of time when you look at your old documents, it comes in as your history. Most of the time it is good for the family. Sometimes we need to know about our ancestors. The market sales show that stationery is still one of the most selling items the world over. Then after saying all this you must have a place in your house for writing or a study which can be used by all family members as per their need. Make writing a habit. It is good. Sometimes your words may be advice for others. You can also refer to another blog written earlier about study too.

Listening – An Art

 

Listening –  An Art

Good speaking is a big quality but good listening is the bigger one. A good speaker must be a good listener otherwise he cannot speak effectively. Listening gives us wisdom, knowledge, and experience in an indirect way. It takes place in a daily routine in homes, in classrooms, in offices, in schools, and in different social groups. At a time, one speaks and many others listen. So, listening takes place more often. 

Good listening is listening carefully, when one is speaking try to forget about what you were going to say next. In this way, you can better understand whatever the speaker wants to say. We can be a good listeners by keeping in view these factors:

Make Eye Contact

Looking directly at the person who’s speaking is a clear way to indicate you’re paying attention to him or her. Looking away, even if you’re still listening, will make it seem like you’re distracted or not interested. It will disturb the speaker.

Make Appropriate Facial Expressions.

Nodding, tilting your head, smiling – all of these expressions show a response to what the speaker is saying, which indicates that you’re grasping the meaning, understanding what the speaker is trying to say, and are interested in what he or she’s saying.

Ask Questions.

Critical listening involves asking questions to get all the information. When you ask the speaker a question, it also drives the conversation and shows that you’re interested in clarification and understanding the issues. It is a very effective strategy. 

Don’t Interrupt.

Although it’s good to ask questions, try not to interrupt the speaker. Let the person complete his or her thoughts before responding or asking questions. In this way, we can give comfort feeling to the speaker.

Paraphrase.

When you restate, in your own words, what the speaker is saying, you prove that you’re listening carefully – after all, you wouldn’t be able to repeat anything if you weren’t paying attention.

Listening Can Be Of Different Types Like:

Careful listening:

The steps discussed above are of careful listening. These are very important and basic. Without these, we cannot listen to others in an effective way. 

Sympathetic Listening:

A good listener must not only be careful. It is possible that we listen to someone very carefully and try our best to fulfill the demands of it, but it cannot help out the speaker. So, to listen with care and with sympathy is a must. In this way, we can respond to the speaker in a better way. We can give him some suggestions to handle certain situations. Different options can help the speaker in some possible ways. This kind of attitude will work in an effective way to relax the speaker.

Empathetic Listening:

Empathy means the quality of the listener to try to feel by placing him/herself into the speaker’s shoes or situation. This quality is too effective for a listener and beneficial for the speaker. It is observed when the speaker tells his/her problem and the listener listens and might listen carefully but could not understand the problem fully and tries to give any suggestion or advice which is not relevant. This kind of response can irritate the speaker. If a listener tries to listen empathically, tries to fully understand the situation then suggests some remedy, it will work better. It is important to place him/herself in the place of the speaker and try to understand his/her feelings.

Listeners may also have the quality to respond to different types of talk in a relative way. If it is a usual and casual one, then he can listen in a light and casual way without responding seriously. In that case, if you try to respond very sympathetically or empathically, it can hurt the speaker. The above-suggested qualities can help in certain situations. A good listener can decide according to the demand of the situation very intelligently that how must he/she respond. In this way, we can perform an effective role in our society and surroundings.

The Real Beauty

 What is beauty?

The real beauty is a relative term. It can be internal or external. Someone says beauty is found in the eyes of the viewer, not in any object or person. Some people define beauty as a typical beauty found in some physical features like long height or white compaction or wide bright eyes and so on and so forth.  In fact, all these things are not in the control of people; these are God-gifted. The real credit does not go to the people having these qualities. It is also true that it depends upon those people to present these qualities in a reasonable or unreasonable way. It defines the personality of the people. Another reality is that these are not permanent, in most of the cases. Time plays its vital role in it. A person may have a wonderful appearance at a time but after 10 or 20 years, the scenario can be totally changed. Very well said: “Personal beauty fades but the beauty of mind endures forever.”

Quality

Some qualities are inner ones like; softness or hardness, kindness or cheapness, patience or impatience, confidence or shyness, brightness or dullness, humility or proudness and innocence or cunning. These qualities are usually permanent or longer lasting. It was found that the physical qualities are very attractive and we cannot ignore them. Sometimes we cannot compromise on them. But if these are not coinciding with good inner qualities, these become dull and less bright with the passage of time. Then, the relations based on these physical qualities become awful or sometimes end soon after.

It is observed that we take a lot of care of our physical beauty by using different things like; cosmetics, soaps, perfumes, jewelry, expensive dresses and shoes etc. We invest a lot of our money, effort and time on these things. Our media encourages this trend by presenting advertisements, by presenting good looking people in dramas and shows. So, we have to give importance to all these things. It is a fact that all these things are also important and we cannot ignore them. Allah also says: “Allah is beautiful and He likes beauty.” But Allah also loves those who are good-hearted and pious.

Types

We live in this world where we have to deal with different issues and problems. We cannot leave many things; those are prevailing in our surroundings. So, we have to learn so much at the same time. How to deal with good or bad situations. Some people have to face extreme poverty, others have very comfortable lives. Both conditions have different demands on a person, male or female. Some people are born in very renowned families and others in notorious ones. Demands change accordingly on the people. Different qualities must be required for different situations, to make themselves successful in life and to present their better image.

Balanced Approach

For a successful life, many things are crucial. A good personality image is of immense importance. It will be the combination of a balanced one. We should give importance to our image that is the combination of our out-look and our inner-self. We must take care of our dress, our personal hygiene, our language, our body posture with our inner goodness. It includes, kind- heartedness, boldness, confidence, positive attitude towards people and events. True self- awareness is also very helpful in making our relations, more realistic and better. This awareness will give a better opportunity to adjust in our society with more confidence and happiness. If this combination is good, then we will have a more attractive and longer-lasting better image. It can help us to improve our society and the condition of our world.

Have A Proper Place For Everything, And It Is Good To Keep Everything In Its Proper Place

 

Define

Although this topic looks irrelevant, but just stop for a minute and think. At night you are at home and suddenly you get a power failure, electricity is off. No light. You need to light a candle. Where is the candle? Ok, somehow I managed to find out the candle. But what I need is a match to light it. Phoo! I can’t find them. Oh! the other person says I know exactly where the candle and the match are placed. He goes there in total darkness grabs both things and lights them. This brings some light to your mind also Have a proper place for everything and place everything in its proper place.

Explain

Keeping everything in its place is very important. First, define areas for the things where should those be kept. A knife has a place in the kitchen. Scissor in the bathroom. Screwdriver in the garage. But you cannot put shoes in the drawing-room or that you are supposed to keep your valuable items like passport or bank documents on the living room table drawer. First, you have to gather a list of the most important and daily use items, yes one more most important medical emergency kit. Sometimes you do not use them every day but you know which thing is placed at which place so just in the most extreme need of that thing you know exactly where it is. 

Benefits

This is not only true for home but for every area of life. Doctor, engineer, banker, lawyer, teacher, shopkeeper, and many more. Not only this but your computer is also covered in it. Filemanager! Yes, keep your personal and job files in proper folders. House keys and car keys are normally placed on some key hooks which must be handy. I might have missed many but I have given a rule for a beautiful life. Try to teach yourself and your young ones to abide by this rule of thumb in life. I learned this from my father and my grandfather. So keeping their name alive and up in my sweet memories forever. Knowledge is always to share. It won’t lessen your creditability. Sometimes if something is kept for a long time, one misses where was it or whether it was there when required. Your past academic records or your participation certificates should also be kept in such a manner that in your free time you want to look at those documents which might take you back in your life. Likewise, you might have a collection of photographs. Keep them also in a proper place. Nowadays youngster does not know the importance of those photographs as now it is the time of the digital era. Therefore digital pictures should also be maintained properly. In nutshell, this script “Have a proper place for everything and place everything in its proper place” organizes you and makes you keep track of everything. You will never get lost in your life. It’s good for you.

Study – Iqra – Read To Seek Knowledge

 

Iqra

Study – Iqra – Read! To Seek Knowledge, Educate Yourself, Be Educated, this was the first verse revealed on our Holy Prophet May Peace Be Upon Him. That was the start of civilization. When you read you get knowledge. From knowledge, you can create things to serve mankind. Application of the mind to the acquisition of knowledge, as by reading or investigation. A good study can increase your confidence. It reduces the level of anxiety. When you are a learned person you get the ability to share your knowledge with others. And sharing your knowledge with others will never decrease your knowledge rather it increases your knowledge. You can also learn to speak with a person with his level of understanding. By studying you actually observe things, analyze them in your brain, try to understand what you have studied, and then you are ready to share it with others.

Never Stop Learning

Although you never stop learning and studying. The best age is when a child starts going to school. Things which a child studies in the school at a small age fixes in his mind forever. You are at your best to express yourself in a better manner. The more you study the more knowledgeable you become. The best book to study and read is the Quran. It has covered everything in this universe which comes in our life. The more we study the Quran the more knowledge we gain.

Manual

We also learn many things by studying the manuals of items besides us. Manual of a computer how to use it. Manual of television, manual of maintenance of a car. There are millions of things you can study. One thing which I have learned in my life is the more I study the more knowledgeable I become. I feel proud that I know that thing. Still, now I feel that I am an illiterate person. It’s not that I am trying to say that I am a learned person but I mean that there are so many things one must learn.

Go To Class Well Prepared

In school or college if a student reads the material beforehand and goes to the class well prepared then he grasps the knowledge with better understanding. Sometimes we start getting annoyed that a person you are expressing yourself to is totally unaware of what you are trying to share, this is the point whether you tell them in an easy way or you simply leave them and look for some learned people to share what you have gained. The best thing is that you make a timetable for the day to spend and keep a few minutes to study something new. A newspaper is among them.

Studying Never Ends

Studying never ends. Then I read many quotes. To acquire knowledge one must study. Learn to discover and discover to learn. Learning builds character. But it does not mean to become arrogant and start fighting with those who are less educated. It is not meant to remain ignorant. Learning makes you a social person and you feel good when you interact with others to share knowledge. It’s not the end of the world. If you have wasted time, forget it and start reading now. Knowledge is not how deep the words are and how difficult the words are, but knowledge is how important and simple the words are.

We have another article on Iqra which you might like to read. Please click here to read

Cleanliness

 

Post author: Khalid Iqbal

• Post publish

Best Cleanliness The Most Important Need Of The Day Forever

Reason Of Dirtiness

Every now and then we are reading and hearing and watching that especially in the rainy season Karachi is hit at the most rather than from bad to worst. Bad sewerage system. Now let us see how it has happened. My childhood was spent in Karachi. At that time it was a clean and beautiful city. Hill-park was a nice place to go to for entertainment and even Clifton and Karachi Zoo were good places to visit. People were having civic sense at that time. Our waste used to go into the dust bin. Secondly, at that time we had never ever heard of or seen plastic shopper bags. At that time there used to be paper bags. Paper, if thrown on the ground, dissolves in water and is gone by the water. Then the era of plastic came along with our arrogant ignorances. We became arrogant and did not bother about the civic sense. We knew that the sweeper there will clean those throw-away wastes as he was being paid for the job. One person threw garbage and then it was followed by others, and then it became our national duty. We started throwing the wrappers and other small things on the roads becoming totally ignorant about what it will be causing. Throwing wastes in the parks knowing that the sweeper will clean it. Unfortunately, we forget that when the wind took that plastic bag and covered the mouth of the drain and water could not pass through that blocked drain. Water was blocked and started piling up and making home to insects and germs and creating filth. It made the environment bad and smelly. Hygiene was getting from bad to worse and causing health issues. Sanitation started getting bad. I being influential, I felt humiliated rather than getting ashamed when someone told me not to spread waste. When the waste started piling up it became the habitat for germs. 

Follow The Good Rules

Due to the accumulation and standing of water, germs are growing in it and it is also starting to stink. It is also creating diseases.  Solution. We must behave, we must take small steps like putting the waste in the dust bin. If someone else has thrown something, request that person politely to pick that up or you should pick up that rubbish and put it in the dust bin. We know that when we are in Europe or in Dubai or the USA, we are not allowed to throw any rubbish on the roads or in public places. Cleanliness is the main theme of not only our religion but of every religion. 

Do Not Blame Government

Why we blame the government? It is written, do not spread litter. Why we ignore it? How come we become so many obedient and followers of the rules when we are in other countries. If we become good in other countries then why not in our own homeland. If I change myself my home will be nice and my country will be beautiful. In my opinion, a civics course should be introduced in our education system. Which must be taught from class one to the last class we attend whether it is matric or intermediate or bachelors or postgraduates or even Ph D. it must be taught just for five minutes a day but every day. As we say prayers five times a day we should be taught and learned these civic values. It is important and good. Think and act fast.